Today was my last emerg shift, and it was really incredibly busy and great learning.
I feel like my learning trajectory with this rotation was what my trajectory with internal should have been and probably would have been if not for the fact that I was doing so poorly at the time.
It has reminded me that I'm actually good at this whole medicine thing. I can do this. I am doing this. Despite everything, I'm still on track to graduate on time with my class, and I'm pretty proud of that.
On Monday I start a family med elective and I'm looking forward to it. Lower acuity, but less in the way of immediate access to imaging and labs so it'll require more logistical thinking, more resource awareness, and I'm looking forward to that. It'll also be a good way to get to know the local outpatient specialists and clinics better. Nerver hurts to improve your list.
Then after that, HOME! Two weeks back on the Island, working in emerg in a very different setting than I've just been in. It's a full-service emerg, but it's not a major trauma/cardiac/neuro centre like here. MIs, strokes, and traumas absolutely come in, but a lot of the most acute stuff goes elsewhere once stable. It'll be really interesting to get a very detailed understanding of who goes to the mainland and how those decisions are made. I really doubt I'd ever be an academic centre physician, so this hospital, which I know so well, is definitely more the sort where I'll end up.
It's nice to have had such a positive, successful rotation over the last few weeks. It's really helped me get back to myself and remember what it is I really love about medicine. The challenge of it. Getting messy. Working with my hands. Being on my feet with ten things in the air, and keeping those things in the back of my brain while I focus on the task ahead of me. I think I did really well with finding a balance.
There were a couple staff who were really fantastic teachers, and I think I may ask one or two if I can do some horizontal shifts with them on weekends or evenings, just so I can get some more experience with emerg and decide if I want to apply to it for sure. I'm thinking I may; I really, really enjoyed this rotation and I think working some more shifts in (without the need for meeting ECEs or having evals done) is going to help clarify things. It's ridiculously competitive so the possibility of matching to it with only one or two electives in it is pretty low, but stranger things have happened.
Come to think of it, I think I may pop my OB/Gyn preceptor an email and see if I could do a horizontal with her too. I want to keep my OB skills fresh.
Don't know why it didn't occur to me earlier that we can still do horizontals in our off hours.
That would really help with my decision-making around CaRMS.
I'm going to go finish my project and then send emails.